Fertilization Report (24 h. past ER)

I tried to sleep as much as possible today, and only got out of bed when the clock showed 11 a.m. I only got up once at 8 a.m. to take the progesterone, but since I went back to sleep, I didn't experience much of the messiness that all girls are talking about. From 11 a.m. I was glued to my cell phone waiting for a call from a clinic. I was constantly checking that I have receptions as we have bad reception in some parts of the house. The wait was painful and agonizing and the call finally came just before 3 p.m. The verdict..... only 2 out of my 3 eggs fertilized, and only 1 went on to divide and grow. The nurse told me that they are still keeping an eye on the one which fertilized but didn't start dividing, so may be it will start growing. I am praying to G-d that it is. But for now we only have 1 growing embie. They will call tomorrow with the report and will schedule ET on Friday.

DH and I did talk about the possible what if.... I am still positive and just taking it one day at a time, I am not considering any scenarios.... I am afraid I'll jinx it if I start making plans for Friday, but on the other hand, I am afraid of being negative and influencing the outcome with my negative thoughts.

After the phone call, I've been talking to my little ones a lot. When we started our TTC journey, I was talking to a Rabbi and asked him when does the soul gets into an embryo and he told me that part of the soul descends at the time of conception. So I am telling my two little "babies" to hang in there for just two more days and thereafter, mommy is going to take care of them. I am telling them that their daddy and I have been waiting for a long time for them. We have a nice house that everybody loves and they'll have a nice room which is waiting for them. All of their uncles and aunties are very anxious to see them too. They will have 4 cousins to play with. Their grandmas and grandpa also are very eager to hold them in their arms. Once they come here, they will be surrounded by lots of love and care. All they have to do right now is just divide and grow, and mommy will take care of both of them from Friday on. I love my two little embies already and can't wait to have them inside me...

I just have to live through tomorrow and Friday. G-d please give me strength.