Hopes Springs Eternal

How stupid can I be? After over 4 years of trying (about 49 cycles), after 5 failed IUIs and 1 failed IVF, I still have a lingering hope that we can get pregnant naturally. Why do I set myself for disappointment and heartbreak AGAIN? Before IVF, I cried pretty much every time I would get AF...

I am not sure how IVF affected my cycle, but based on my old cycle, I supposed to ovulate in the next several days. I've been very bloated and crampy (feeling pretty much the same as before ER), I don't know if those injections are still affecting my body - but it sure feels this way. DH and I have already BDed several times, but we have to time it a bit to make sure that we gather the best of the little swimmers, so the next one is on Friday (when according to my calculations I should ovulate). So, once again, I am planning I am hoping, thinking that "may be....". Although, it would be soooo cool to get pregnant the old fashion way. I live by the proverb "Hopes Spring Eternal" or if you translate the similar one from Russian it says "hope dies last", yep. The story of my life. I am an optimist (although sometimes I tend to forget about it).

All I need now is one little miracle!!! Please pray for me...