Thursday, May 5, 2011
Sad...
I am just so sad tonight... Just want to bang my head against the wall... I get this feeling sometimes after the BFN, at least I remember feeling this way after one of the failed IUI's just want to break something... I think I still cannot comprehend how such a perfect cycle resulted in a BFN... I can't wait for AF to start have my body rid itself of all the hormones that are driving me crazy. Everything and everyone are annoying me today. I am pissed of that when I sent an invitation for 3 p.m. for my b-day on Sunday most of my friends replied that they are going to be late. WTF - I want this day to be about me and if I am too much of an inconvenience then may be I don't really want those people in my life. How rude!!! I have to get up at 5:30 a.m. on Monday (and every weekday, including tomorrow) so I don't want people in my house past 8 p.m. I don't know, just have to calm down and live through the next few weeks until our appointment. It is just hard to continue going like nothing happened. Have so many unfinished blogs but just don't want to bother right now. Going to bed, so hopefully tomorrow will bring AF and more positive thoughts.
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I really understand! EVERYONE has been annoying me every since my failed cycle. I have turned in to a major b - but I just really don't care.
ReplyDeleteI hope tomorrow is a better day!
(((HUGS)))
ReplyDeleteHope AF comes soon for you and me too. I hate the blah angry phase of grief. I just want to sit on my couch, drink red wine, eat pizza and tell the world to F-off. I have no time for them right now... I know how you are feeling and I hope that your birthday will bring you some happiness for that day. Big hugs.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry Rosachka, I know all to well how that feels. I wouldn't even wish this on my worst enemy.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you and hoping things will get better soon. I hope you have a great Birthday! Maybe a big glass of wine is just what the doctor ordered. ((BIG HUGS))
Firstly, happy birthday to a fellow Taurus. Loyal, dedicated and stubborn, sometimes we can be our own worst enemies.
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel. When everything just annoys the heck out of you, even if it didn't bother you before. I found that when others thought something was a big deal, you just look at them and think "Do you know what I'm going through? That's a big deal!" At work, I used to be a social butterfly, chatting with my peers but now, I just hole myself up in my classroom and avoid chatting with people who don't know my situation.
Take care of yourself. Take time to heal and try to cut your friends a little slack. We all have our busy lives. I'm sure they don't know how fragile you are at this time. On the plus side, they're still coming to honor your day.
Thinking of you, Rosachka. I'm not blogging or commenting much, but want to reach out to my friends who are experiencing darkness in their lives as I am. Be easy with yourself and ride the emotions as they come. ((Big Hugs)) You are so strong and lovely and I know you will find your way out of this darkness and find hope again.
ReplyDeleteI am new to your blog and wanted to say I am sorry for the BFN and that you are having a hard time. It is hard for others to understand what we are feeling, unless they have gone through IF. It is so much easier to sometimes cut ties and hide for a bit. Do what you need to do for you...*hugs*
ReplyDeleteHi there, I have just come across your blog and am sorry things have not gone well for you. I too have done IUI's, and am now on my second ivf. Please feel free to drop by my blog, perhaps we can help each other in some way. take care
ReplyDelete