Well a lot has been happening but I haven't been able to sit down and record everything, so this is kind of a condensed version.
The first week at home with DH was great, including an awesome unseasonally warm weather. The second week (March 26 to 31) DH was supposed to get back to the office, but I wasn't ready for it emotionally. I cried every time I would think about being alone with the baby without him around. So DH changed his plans and decided to work from home. The plan was that he would work from home and I would take care of the baby without interrupting him much. This would give me a chance to see what it takes to do it myself. It was also a shorter week, as on Thursday (March 29) we had a pediatrician appointment and on Friday (March 30) was DH's birthday. I did manage by myself pretty well, the physical pain is not that bad and emotionally I was getting better too plus my mom came in to keep me company and go for a walk a few times. DH was mostly working in his home office, but still would come out from time to time to be with me and the little one, so I didn't feel very lonely. There was just one day when BIL came in to work with DH from our house and I didn't have as much access to DH as I had during the week.
So Thursday (March 29) we had our pediatrician appointment and it was finally an appointment with our original pediatrician. The first thing the nurse did is weight our little one and when she told us the number it seemed a bit low. When the doctor came in and looked at the chart, he decided to weight the little one again himself. The weight was a bit bigger, but still low as it looked like he didn't gain any weight from the previous week. I was very disappointed and right away thought that there was something wrong with me and my milk. The doc said that the baby otherwise looked good and he wasn't worried about the weight thing. DH & I thought and decided that last time when the little one was measured he had a full diaper, and this time we actually changed him before being weighted, so there might have been some discrepancy there. Plus I am thinking that the substitute doctor might have not weighted him properly a week ago and that's why he didn't gain any weight. As our little one was feeding about every 2 hours I asked the doc if it was ok, and he said that for now it was but after a few weeks he would prefer that the little one was feeding 3 - 3.5 hours apart. He wanted to see us the following Monday for weighting and at that time we would figure out what to do.
On Friday (March 30) was DH's birthday. Neither of us were in a mood to do anything and decided that we are not celebrating it this year. DH said that he already had everything that he wanted and that I made him the best birthday present ever - our son. But a week a so prior I was talking to my sis and told her jokingly that we are going to come to her house for Shabbat dinner on Friday and would celebrated DH's birthday there. She talked to her hubby and they agreed to host it. We wanted to pitch in - but they wouldn't let us. It turned out to be very nice. The little one did great - he stayed in his car seat all the time and actually dozed off for a bit. The dinner was only for our family (which is still a lot of people) and a couple of close friends. It was nice that we could just get up and leave when it was time for the little one to eat and go to bed, without cleaning up. We are not ready to host even our families at our house just yet.
On Saturday (March 31) the cleaning lady was coming to clean the house, so we went for breakfast to my BIL & SIL house. Again, it was nice that I could just concentrate on the baby and not on being a hostess. After breakfast DH needed to run some errands so I asked him to drive me to my parent's house and that's where the little one and I spent the rest of the day. The grandparents really enjoyed it. My uncle also stopped by. He wanted to hold the baby and I let him. He is my favourite and only uncle and for some reason me and him have a very special relationship. After spending a few hours with me and the baby (and my parents of course) he gave me an envelope which contained a very generous gift (did I tell you I am his favourite niece!)
On Sunday (April 1) the weather was very shitty and DH, I and our little one spent the entire day on the couch with DH & me watching TV. I did have a headache at the end and told DH that notwithstanding the weather we should be getting out at least once a day. But it was nice to be just the three of us.
So, week 3 - I was all on my own as DH was going back to the office. I had a nice transition as Monday (April 2) was a short day as we were due at the pediatrician office at 2 p.m. to weight our little one, and I told DH that by the time we were done it was not worth for him to go back to the office only to turn around and be going home within an hour or two. He agreed and said that he would work from home in the afternoon (Yes!!!). Our little one gained 260 grams and the pediatrician was very pleased - he said that he would have been pleased with only 50 grams. I also asked him about the little one hiccuping a lot and sneezing and he said that all of this is normal, plus all the wheezing sounds are normal too and would even get worse! We would see him again at 1 month check up - yep, we are finally problem free!!!
So during the week on my own, I developed some sort of routine. The little one would not go to sleep in his bassinet after his last feeding at 6-7 a.m. So he would sleep on my chest until next feeding around 9-10 a.m. (he doesn't have a set schedule yet, and his daily feeding times differ from day to day), then I would feed him, quickly go to the washroom, brush my teeth, get dressed and we both go downstairs for me to eat, and then my mom would come and we would go or a walk and the little one would sleep in the stroller. The rest of the day, he would only sleep when I am holding him and not in his bassinet, play pan or bouncy chair. I was getting exhausted by the time DH was coming home as the little one was constantly with me, and when he was having gas pains I couldn't even put him down for a second. He was waking up every 2-3 hours at night as well. DH & I would spend our quality time together in front of TV after we put him to bed for the night so would not go to bed until midnight or 1 a.m., which of course doesn't leave much for sleeping during the night. We are trying to get better and get to bed earlier, but for now have been unsuccessful at that.
The best part of week 3 was that it was also a short week due to Good Friday being on April 6. It also coincided with the first night of Passover. We had the first seder at my sis' place. We brought the bassinet part of the stroller with us and when it was time for the little one to get down for the night, he actually felt asleep in it, which was nice, but during most of the reading of Haggadah the little one spent on my arms. The bonus, since my arms were occupied I didn't eat much and didn't overeat as I always do.
On Saturday, April 7, we have been invited to two birthday parties, and we declined both of them as didn't want to travel with the little one. It was great just to be home - the three of us. I am so enjoying this. We decided to go for a long walk to a grocery store, plus DH wanted to visit MIL so she could see her grandson. (I am not going to go into details here, how I don't like when MIL holds my baby. Everything she does with him annoys me. We told he numerous times that we are not rocking him as we don't want to get into a habit - and she ALWAYS does that. Annoying!) Anyways, she was yapping and yapping and I was on the clock as we had to get back home before the baby needed to be fed. I was getting impatient and fidgety, but she would get the hint, until I actually started walking away. We spent over 30 min talking to her and the store was far away. We ended up walking over 6 km and of course the time did run up and the last stretch we were almost running as he was without food for 3.5 hours. I was debating to just sit on a bench and feed him, but it was pretty chilly outside. Fortunately, the stroller did lull him and he was asleep all the way (he was getting fussy at the store), but he almost bit off my boob when I finally sat down to feed him. He is like a little piranha when he is hungry :).
On Sunday (April 8) was my dad's b-day. We had breakfast at my SIL & BIL house and we actually walked there (surprising as it is usually hard for me to get DH to walk anywhere, unless we go specifically for a walk). The weather was nice and we decided to go to my parents' house a bit early so that we can go for a walk in their neighbourhood as there is a great trail very close to their house, but by the time we got to their house the weather deteriorated and we ended up just staying indoors with me attending to my son and DH helping my parents with preparations. I set up camp in our old bedroom upstairs and when the guests were arriving I was there with the little one trying to have a little nap. I should mention that when DH and I first got to my parents' house we were very hungry and had some food, so by the time the party started I was pretty full. Of course, when I went downstairs with the little one in my arms, every single person was trying to be helpful wanted to hold him to let me eat. I had to brush off those people the entire evening, as it was overstimulating for him as is with so many people and faces. I did find refuge on a couch in a corner with two of my mom's good friends surrounding me (and actually feeding me at one point). So I stayed there for a few hours as more people were coming in. When it was time to breast feed the little one, I went upstairs. It was time to have he down for his nap and I spent a good hour trying to put him to sleep, but he was too overwhelmed. I could hear the party downstairs, but had no inclination of joining. It is so funny how my priorities changed. I would have loved to chit chat with everyone there as I haven't seen some of them for some time, but I preferred to stay with my little one and the party was more a bother than enjoyment. At some point I did take the little one and went downstairs, but there were a lot more people, and my spot was already taken (by my MIL, ugh!) so I quietly went back upstairs. I called DH and told him that it was time to go as I couldn't put the little one to sleep and he was getting very fussy and we were the first ones to leave. The best part that everyone understands why you are leaving early and there are no conversations and long goodbyes. With the little one in my arms I just waived at everyone and said that we were leaving without actually talking to each individual guest(which is what we usually do, and what is expected).
Monday (April 9) I asked DH if he is going to the office as Easter Monday is not a statutory holiday in Ontario. His brother was not going, so he decided to stay and work from home. He didn't go for a walk with me in the morning and it was my baby and me just like any other working day. In the afternoon, we decided to walk to a different grocery store (then on Saturday) the one which is closer. So I was waiting for DH to finish working and me with the little on on top fell asleep for over 2 hours. Then the little one was sleeping all through the walk, which resulted in the horrible night. He was up since 4 a.m. feeding and around 7 a.m. I woke up DH and told him that it is his turn with the baby as I needed at least 1 hour of sleep before he leaves to the office.
I was a bit pissed after such a rough night (and I was handling sleeping in 2 hour increments pretty good), so I made a decision to try to stick to a routine which is in the baby whisperer book that I liked. To do that I had to put him down for naps during the day. He was actually so exhausted from the night that he felt asleep in his bouncy chair. I did decide that I would not let him sleep on top of us anymore as well. Well, the second night was not great either, but I blame it on us going to a store on Tuesday (April 10) night and getting home late (with the little one once again sleeping in the car seat throughout the trip). So Wednesday (April 11) I was trying to stick to "EASY" schedule as much as I could. It refers to the sequence of events - eat, activity, sleep (and "you" time) and I started to swaddle the little one myself and put him in his bassinet for his naps (with one nap in the stroller during our daily walks). It did work and yesterday sleep has been pretty good with the intervals close to 3 hours. I also figured that I was measuring the time between feeding incorrectly. I always measured from the end of one feeding to the beginning of the other feeding, when everyone else is measuring from start to start. So if I measure it that way, our little one can go for much longer periods of time.
So today, April 12, our little one turned 4 weeks old. He has grown and changed a lot and is over 4.9kg. He has been giving us some smiles from time to time. I know they are involuntary, but it still melts our hearts when we see him smile. The breast feeding is going ok. It is not perfect as sometimes he is very fidgety and doesn't latch properly and I have no clue why. He also has cluster feeds from time to time and that's exhausting on my "girls". I am constantly worrying about my milk supply, as the "girls" are not as full as they were before and by the time he is done it feels like they are completely empty. Our little one eats very quickly, when he latches on he starts gulping milk like there is no tomorrow - and sometimes chokes on it as he tries to get all in. So I would usually be done by about 8-10 min, but now I am having him suck for longer to make sure that he is fully satisfied, so feeding time is close to 15-20 minutes. We also change his diaper half way through or usually once he loses interest in feeding, and after he is changed he has renewed power to suck it all out.
DH has been amazing in helping me throughout. He gets up at night to give him the pacifier. Yes, we do give him pacifier. We caved in and bought a few when our little one was 10 days old, and they have been helping tremendously. He soothes himself and drifts off to sleep much easier. I've been following baby whisperer's advise on how to put the baby to sleep and there is no rocking and walking with the little one in our arms for hours for him to fall asleep. Generally he is pretty good when he goes to sleep for the night (naps for now take much longer and more effort). Anyways, back to DH. We do alternate at night if the little one is crying and it is not time to feed. If it is - I usually get up and feed him and then if he is unswaddled, I would wake up DH to change him and swaddle him again (as my swaddles are not the best). If he is still swaddled pretty nicely and didn't poo while I was feeding him, I would just put him back to bed without waking DH up, but that hasn't been happening lately. As well, DH would stay with him after the 6-7 a.m. feed until it is time for him to go to the office, which has been very helpful to me too. Plus, he spends a lot of time with our son when he comes home from the office. So yes, my DH is AMAZING!!!
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